A New "Hire Charles McCarthy" Comic

I know you have all been waiting for it, and here it is, the latest "Hire Charles McCarthy" comic strip by Hugo Ballz of hugoballz.com. I think it is maybe a little needy and pandering, but I still appreciate the art.

On a sad note, my arch nemesis Alex C. has fallen very far in my opinion. His witty comments and insults of old have degenerated into racial slurs and curses.

Again, I ask all of you to keep Alex C. in your thoughts and prayers to whatever higher power you believe in.

Alex,

Please go to the doctor. I think you might have a brain tumor that is cutting off blood to important parts of your brain.

Happy Time

The movie "Our Time Is Up," a short film that my friend Pia Clemente produced has been nominated for an Oscar, which as some of you may know, is pretty major and exciting. I have a pretty strong feeling that she is going to win.

“Our Time Is Up”
A Station B Production
Rob Pearlstein and Pia Clemente

If you are putting money on the Oscars, bet on this film, but don't put too much money on it and them blame me later if you don't win.

Good Luck Pia!

The Waiting Game

I am still waiting for news, but I am not sitting around on my thumbs. I am shopping around a short comedy that my campaign manager Erni and I wrote (it's a Zach Galifianakis vehicle), and I am also working on creating a new prime time drama. I also talked with the reporter from the Red & Black again tonight. She is working on a new angle. I am also getting ready for my art show coming up in March at the Sabra Gallery in East Atlanta. Yes, I am waiting, but still working, plugging away.

No word from Patrick Swayze yet either.

Again, thank you all for your support, keep up the good work. It ain't over till it's over.

Up To Date Update

Once again, I have received many emails from concerned supporters questioning the fact that there wasn't an article about me in the Red & Black this Friday. I am not really sure why the article didn't appear. I think they are trying to push it back until I get or don't get a job.

As far as the job goes, I have not had any word yet.

My Open Letter To Patrick Swayze

This is my open letter to Patrick Swayze. Feel free to repost it, and send it around, especially if Patrick Swayze is on your list serve.

Dear Patrick,


Let me introduce myself. My name is Charles McCarthy. You may have seen some of my other posts on Craig's List. Recently I have been campaigning to be hired by Adult Swim. I am writing to you for two reasons.

First, to tell you that "Road House" is an amazing movie. I am surprised every time I see it. I don't think that I am the first person to think this, and some studio exec will probably read this and steal my idea, but someone should make a sequel to "Road House," something like "Road House 2: The Next Day" or "Road House 2: More New Blood." You and Doc have been married for a while. She decides to go to Malaysia to help with the ongoing recovery efforts in the wake of the tsunami. You go with her. The town that you go to is a port whose local hotspot attracts tourists, locals, sailors, and to the chagrin of everyone, pirates. While the Doc is busy treating kids for malaria, you are treating Malaysian pirates to a butt whooping. I know it seems like a tall order for you to take on an entire gang of Malaysian pirates by yourself, so even though I know you could take them all by yourself, you get help from a local hot shot fighter with a rocky past similar to your own played by Erni Banks. I think it might be pretty cool if Billy Blanks, playing himself, stopped through the town on vacation and helped you out in one of the fights, but left quickly after the fight, telling you that you were crazy for staying and fighting Malaysian pirates.

Second, I was wondering if you could endorse me in my campaign to be hired by Adult Swim. You can write a small letter and send it to me, and I will put it up on my my blog adultswimshouldhirecharlesmccarthy.blogspot.com and it would be great if you could sign my petition. I don't think you need to kill anyone with your bare hands.

Oh, and if you happen to know Zach Galifianakis, please let him know that I have a script that my friend Erni Crews and I wrote just for him that I really want him to read. Thank you for your time, and I can't wait to see "Road House 2."


Sincerely,


Charles McCarthy

Another "Hire Charles McCarthy" Comic

You have all been waiting for it, and here it is, the latest "Hire Charles McCarthy" comic by my good friend Hugo Ballz. This is a very uplifting one isn't it? You can find more comics by Hugo Ballz at HugoBallz.com.

Today I am going to write some open letters to Patrick Swayze, asking him for his support in my cause, so if you know Patrick Swayze, or you are Patrick Swayze, get in touch with me.

Keep up the good work. Keep writing the emails and signing the petition!

Road House

I know that it might seem slightly off topic, but I have to talk about this. I just saw the movie "Road House," staring Patrick Swayze. Wow! Wow!! I had seen it before, and I will never forget such great lines as, "Pain don't hurt," but man, there are more jewels of bad dialogue in "Road House," than diamonds in South Africa, and more pointless scenes than LA in general. However, an amazing thing about "Road House" is the fact that the performances offered up by it's cast are probably the best that could ever be expected considering the writing, probably better. An even more amazing thing about "Road House," is that you cannot stop watching it. If you watch five minutes of "Road House," you will watch all of "Road House." You cannot stop. I dare any of you to start watching "Road House," and try to stop half way through. You can't.

Please, please, think of me as Patrick Swayze, and think of yourselves as the towns people rallying around me at the end of "Road House," or maybe you could think of me as Patrick Swayze and network television is the town that I have to clean up, or best yet, think of me as Patrick Swayze and Adult Swim as the road house in "Road House," and it's where I belong.

"All's quiet on the Western front"

It seems a lot's been happening since I last posted. I've been busy busy busy with my own doings, including getting my own blog up and running. But I have been watching. Oh yes, just in case things got a bit out of control but matters seem to be well in hand.

I have to say, Charles has had some good things happening on the campaign front but he might want to stay away from power tools for a while- it would be a shame to be right on the cusp but then suffer some sort of weird mishap worthy of a drummer in Spinal Tap....

And it's nice to see Alex C is still out there tilting at windmills and hurling his vitriol. He lends a certain balance to the proceedings with his unhinged ravings and unbridled hatred- much the same way Bush needs Bin Ladin, we need Alex. He keeps us from getting fat and complacent and makes each step forward that much sweeter. Keep the insults and slams coming and remember- every time you jack off, god kills another kitten.

Stevie Z
Provocateur General
1/25/06

The views expressed in this post are not necessarily those of Charles McCarthy, Eli Lilly pharmaceuticals, Charles Manson, or paraplegic ducks nicknamed 'The Hammer'.

Pushed Back

I know many of you were disappointed when you didn't see a glorious article about me in the Red & Black. Don't send any death threats to them though or start planning some sort of attack on their printing press. The article was simply pushed back to Friday, so look for it on Friday.

I was kind of upset too, but I am now more excited than ever to read the article, and I did receive a nice surprise today from Robert Bailey. He has created a very nice art film about me. It took a long time to load for me, so be patient. Check it out by going to his website, RobertBaileyDesign.com. Thank you Robert for your contribution to the cause.

Also, for those of you interested in my fine art, my biography page is now up for the art show that I am having in March at the Sabra Gallery. If your heart truly aches to find out more about me, where I am from, why I am an artist, and what I am thinking, you can go to SabraGallery.com and read all about me and see a couple of samples of my work.


I hope you have all been keeping my arch nemesis Alex C. in your hearts and minds. His decline seems to be continuing at a steady pace. Let's all hope that it isn't permanent.

As always, continue to email Adult Swim and to sign the petition and keep being awesome.

Red & Black Article

Still no word back from Adult Swim, but I am really looking forward to reading the article about my campaign in tomorrow's Red & Black. I know you are all scrambling to figure out how you can get to Athens, Ga by tomorrow to pick up a copy of the Red & Black, and I have good news for you. You don't have to go to Athens to pick up a hard copy of the Red & Black because it is online. You can read the article and feel proud to be part of something by going to RedAndBlack.com tomorrow. They might run this picture of me that was taken by my good friend Mack Williams when we were in Mexico last year to see RCPM. By the way, I don't smoke. I was holding that cigarette for our sherpa Maggie, without whom, I don't know what we would have done.

How Did The Interview Go?

I have had many emails asking how my interview went, and I am sorry that I haven't updated you all sooner. My interview went well. It was much more dramatic than the last one, mainly just because most of the lights were off in the room. This interview was with the creators of 12oz. Mouse and Squidbillies, and I am happy to report that they all seemed like good guys.

Yes, my interview went pretty well, but I can't say the same for the rest of my day. Stabbed my finger with a drill bit. I hit my head on a sharp corner of my desk, and my car broke down. Yep, the rest of my day did not go so well, up until I found out that there will be an article about me in UGA's award winning student newspaper, The Red & Black.

One last thing before I go, I would like you all to pray to whatever higher power you believe in, or if you don't believe in one, maybe do some scientific research for my arch nemesis Alex C. I think he is really feeling under the weather. His taunting rhetoric has really slipped over the last couple of days in a dramatic and almost Flowers-For-Algernonesque way. Keep fighting Alex.

Adult Swim Should Hire Charles McCarthy

Kids, now is the time to ban together. Charles needs us more than ever. Since I am the re-re on West Coast time, it's highly likely that he's already had his Adult Swim interview today, and thus I would like to retro-actively send him a shit ton of positive energy. Many of you may not have known until this very second that positive energy could be measured in tons, but it can, and shit tons at that.

I'm done wasting your time for today, but rest assured I will not sleep or eat or even breathe until Charles McCarthy has his much-deserved job at Adult Swim! GET THEM CHARLES. Get Them.

CHARLES MCCARTHY IN '06

Big Day Tomorrow

Well, it is a big day tomorrow. I have another interview at Adult Swim, so I encourage you to all keep your fingers crossed, and those of you talented in such things, your toes.

I hurt my thumb this weekend playing basketball, and I really hope it doesn't affect my interview.

Here is a haiku to thank you all for all of your help.


V
by
Charles McCarthy

I once watched V
the mini series about
lizard aliens.

Flaming Gouls Are On My Side

This is the new and improved t-shirt design from Keith Dillon. You can buy shirts and other amazing products with this design on them by clicking here.

I would just like to take a moment to thank all of you and all of my amazing staff. I don't know if I could have kept going without all of you and all of your support. It's not over. We have to keep working hard. We can't stop now.

Here is a poem to thank all of you who have taken the time to write to Adult Swim and sign my petition.

Gold
by
Charles McCarthy

I wish I could find some gold
so that I could hold it
in my hand and freak out
like some old man with a
beard and an old pan
I wish I could find some gold
Would I jump up and down?
Would I go yeeehaw?
Or would I grumble and gaffaw
and run and hide worried
that people were looking
to stick a knife in my side
I have seen it so many times
Gold fever in the movies
and in the country side.
I saw a show about a guy
who did speed and dug a mine
in his back yard thinking
that there was gold in thar
He didn't find any gold but
he planted some to make
his cracked out friends continue
to dig.
Then he stole a tank.
I want to feel that kind of dedication to a metal.

Postponed

I know some of you have been on the edge of your seats, wondering how my second interview at Adult Swim went. Well, it didn't happen. My meeting had to be pushed to Monday. Be assured that I will let you all know what happens as soon as I get done, and I am sorry that I kept you all biting your nails.

Remember to keep the emails coming and to sign my petition if you haven't already.

Greetings from sunny California! It is, indeed, sunny today, with gusty winds and a chance of disillusionment.

Although The City of Angels doesn't know it yet, they are about to become Mr. McCarthy's number one fans. Soon as that helicopter full of tootsie rolls lets the bottom drop out, this'll be one delicious campaign you can't say no to.

Get ready Los Angeles, here comes the brown!...I mean, the chocolate! Wait, if I could just start that over again...

Get ready Los Angeles, here comes Charles McCarthy all over your face!

I'd like to go ahead and formally retract that statement.

CHARLES MCCARTHY IN '06!

-erni

Lots of news. LOTS! First, this kick ace t-shirt design was designed for me by Keith Dillon. I think he is going to have shirts with it on them for sale soon, and be sure to check out all his other interesting shirt designs here. Second, I had an interview with a reporter today from a pretty well read newspaper. They are thinking about doing a piece on me and my campaign. Third, Chez from Lonely Island sent me this encouraging email in response to an email that I wrote him asking for help:

"abso-fucking-lutely! you deserve the world mr. mcCarthy and I intend to give it to you on a gold-plated platter."


Thanks Chez. Please take over SNL completely.

Fourth, last, but definitely not least, I have another interview at Adult Swim tomorrow.

You guys are all great, keep up the good work. Now is not the time to rest. Keep your emails coming. Thank you all, especially you Alex C. You complete me, not in Jerry Maguire kind of way, but more of an evil-twin-yin-yang kind of way. You are the dark to my light, and that means something, so thank you.

Here is yet another great installment of "Hire Charles McCarthy." I think that this one really clears up a lot of questions that we might have all been having from the last couple of strips. Again, this comic was created for me by my good friend Hugo Ballz of hugoballz.com.

Keep up the emails to Adult Swim, and be sure to sign the petition if you haven't already.

Ah, greetings all. Apparently while I was off enjoying a lovely holiday, all hell has broken loose here. Everybody's favorite psycho, Alex C, has been stirring up the pot again and creating mischief.

Now, mind you, as self-annointed 'Provocateur General' of the campaign to get Charles hired on at Adult Swim, I am not necessarily opposed to a bit of muckraking. Au contraire. But it all depends upon whether one is the muckee or the mucker.

So our little Alex seems to be in the throes of a little jealousy tantrum. Perhaps he feels his job is being threatened. Or maybe he suffers from some sort of hormonal deficiency and cannot grow hair and the sight of Charles' throwback facial hair has touched upon a sore nerve.

Whatever the reason, he has taken it upon himself to go after Charles. "You vil follow ze RULES, seig heil!!" not realizing the well-placed irony of someone breaking with normal constraints and niceties in applying for a job with a group whose programming seeks to break the constraints of good taste and go outside the lines.

Ah, just look on in with concern upon his little fits of anger, stalking Charles across the web, seeking to defame him at every step in what amounts to a very unhealthy example of homoerotic fixation. It's ok, Alex. We understand. Come out of the closet, release your inner woman, whatever. These are brave new times and odds are that Georgia has progressed to the point where you won't be lynched for such things. There's places up in Buckhead that'll welcome you with open arms and provided the nurturing environment you so obviously need.

Hells yeah, man. Just put on the late Freddy Mercury's song "I've Got To Be Free", throw on a pair of women's underwear, and be the real you that's struggling to get out and manifesting its displeasure with being repressed by attacking total strangers in a prime example of misplaced self-loathing.

Do it. You have nothing to lose but your chains, although you may want to keep them just because fashion is all about accessorizing. Throw on a pair of stripper heels, hop on up to Buckhead, and all the rest will fall into place and you'll thank us later.

Stevie Z
Provocateur General
1/17/06

The views expressed in this post are not necessarily those of Charles McCarthy, Eli Lilly pharmaceuticals, Charles Manson, or paraplegic ducks nicknamed 'The Hammer'.

I just wanted to share some positive emails that I have received. I don't want Alex C. to get you all down. There are billions of good people in the world. Here are some emails from a couple of them.

Christin P. writes:

"Hey chuck,
I have read your blog etc...and just wanted to wish you luck
with your campaign! oh never forget that the world is
amazing................
ciao,
christin"


Concerned citizen and LA actor looking for work Michael J. Kirkland writes:

"Did you get hired yet?"



John A. even sent me this internet tag circa 1993

*************************************
* *
* *** HIRE CHARLEZ MCKARTHY! *** *
* *
*************************************

Thanks John.



There is a lot of love out there. Again, thank you all for your support and keep up the good work. Don't forget to sign the petition and email Adult Swim if you haven't done so already.

I have discovered the root of my arch nemesis Alex C.'s hatred and anger towards me. I am kind of disappointed that it boils down to simple envy and jealousy. I was hoping to find out that I had somehow unknowingly killed his cat or something. Apparently someone wants a job at Adult Swim too, and his name is Alex C. and he is upset that he didn't think to start his own grass roots campaign for a job there. Read his post on Wikapedia and tell me what you think:

"Vanity material. The guy is a freakin' joke. He wants to be hired by Adult Swim without going through the turnerjobs.com website that 99.9% of people hired by the company have to/have had to/must go through. Actually, if you want to be technical, he'd be hired by Time Warner, then placed into their Cartoon Network division, then eventually filtered into a position for Adult Swim (like the Junior Writer position or Flash Animation position or whatever). But at any rate, it's just some dork with a beard trying to stand out in the crowd and hoping like Hell that it works enough to find him a job at Adult Swim as . . . well, I don't really know what he wants to do. If you look at his resume I'm guessing some sort of animator job.
At any rate, I deleted the links -- and I don't doubt he put them up himself in the first place. What a dweeb, and a LAZY dweeb at that. I can admire his iniative, but as one who wants to work for Adult Swim myself, and who has no "connections" inside -- thus being forced to whore out through the turnerjobs.com site and go up against hundreds, if not thousands of applications -- I think he's a douchebag for even trying this. I've stated as such to him in e-mail, and he took it as a joke. Go figure. I don't see any reason to put the links back in, unless he gets hired by them, in which case perhaps put them back in to show "hey, here's some dumbass who made himself stand out and be noticed by Adult Swim by ACTING like a dumbass." For now, they're gone. -"


The only other thing I can possibly deduce from this is that he might be the turnerjobs.com web master because he has mentioned turnerjobs.com in every single letter to me. Maybe he is angry because he feels like he has been usurped and sees his power as turnerjobs.com's web master humbled by my grass roots campaign. But, I think this is highly unlikely.

Keep up the good work people. Spread the word. Keep the emails coming. And, Alex C. you keep on hating me. If I had an arch nemesis like you in college, I probably would have been student body president.

Here is yet another installment of the comic strip about me "Hire Charles McCarthy" by Hugo Ballz of hugoballz.com I hope you enjoy it. I think it is a continuation of the last on. Maybe it will make things clearer.

Please post this places and email it to your friends and family. Thank you all for your support.

Here is another encouraging letter from my arch nemesis Alex C. It sounds like somebody got up on the wrong side of the bed today. I know it is all just touch love Alex, and I can take it. I love you too. Here is the email. Check it out:

Hello there dumbass. I see you had an "interview"
with Adult Swim. I'm sure you were a popular topic of
conversation after you left. "Hey, did you see that
retard Charles McCarthy? Guy looks like a fucking
pedophile, or maybe a Waffle House cook who forgot to
shave last night! AH, HA HA HA HAAA! Hey! Let's make a
character out of him on the new Harvey Birdman we're
working on! There won't be shit he can do about it,
because it'll be parody! Fucking dweeb! Can you
believe he wanted a job here?"

I'm sure it wasn't as bad as that. They probably
called you a dork rather than a dweeb.

I see by doing a Google search on your name that you
have been spamming the holy hell out of craigslist.
Yea, I'm sure Time Warner really wants a KNOWN
INTERNET SPAMMER working for them. Great move, idiot.
Oh, and I removed the links to your blog and petition
off of the Wikipedia entry on Adult Swim. Nice try,
Mr. Mensa, but Wikipedia -- much like myself -- hates
vandals.

Rot in Hell, you greasy bastard.

Here is another "Hire Charles McCarthy" comic strip by Hugo Ballz of hugoballz.com. I am not exactly sure what he is trying to say with this. I guess he is trying to tell Adult Swim that no mater how you look at me, I am attractive in one way or another. I don't know. I am still not sure why I have gray hair either, but such is art. Is his a mind of madness or a big gushing sack of genius? Only time will tell.

Please keep your emails to Adult Swim coming, and if you haven't signed my petition yet, please sign it.

You are all beautiful in one way or another.

Charles McCarthy's Facial Hair Garners Applause!

Let's face the facts, people. There are literally hundreds of hard-working folks with the comedic ability and resume to get jobs with Adult Swim. Thousands, maybe! (That may be overstepping it. I apologize.)

But do any of those people have the tenacity to grow such alluring facial hair? If you answered with a resounding "NO!" then you are correct, and shall be rewarded with a clear conscience. Those of you who did not answer with a resounding "NO!" will never again see the light of day as a moral human being who contributes to society in a way that enhances the lives of those around you.

The voice of the people has spoken, and it says, "Give us Chesterfields* or give us Death!" A vote for Charles McCarthy is a vote for the Chesterfield. And a vote for the Chesterfield is a vote for a stronger America.

CHARLES MCCARTHY IN '06!

-erni crews, campaign manager and humane society reject

*Chesterfield: the style of beard presently worn by Mr. McCarthy and all great patriots.

Tonight, boys & girls, it's Tunes From The Apocalypse 101.

I'm feeling saucy tonight. Our man Charles had his interview, which turned out to be legit after all. And I just returned home from seeing The Rolling Stones.

Go ahead- write them off as decrepit old geezers and instead suck up the schlock disguised as music that's spoon-fed to you by MTV. At least the Stones write and play their own fucking music. Go ahead and buy your rebellion at the local mall, Keith Richards can roll and smoke one of those little pseudo rebel suburban snotnoses with one hand while hitting the opening chords to Jumpin Jack Flash with his other. Last time I saw the Stones, at the end of a 2+ hour show, Jagger sprinted from one end of the stage (about 200') to the other WHILE SINGING and left his bodyguard, a guy in his mid-30s, doubled over and sucking wind from trying to keep up with him.

Fuck it. Tonight the weasels have been driven out of the temple with "Midnight Rambler" blasting from the speakers.

All is good and right with the world. That is All Ye Need To Know. At least for now.

I know what you are thinking, and I do look pretty good in corduroy, but check out this hat that I got! No, I didn't get hired yet, so don't stop the campaign. I still need your help.

This is the last push. Don't give up on me now!

I had the interview, and it was real Adult Swim people, and no ninjas tried to jump me on my way into the interview. I think it went well, but that still doesn't mean that the fight is over. Keep emailing Adult Swim. Keep singing the protest songs that you have all written or appropriated from other movements. Keep up the graffiti campaign in Istanbul. I know you guys are really putting your necks out for me.

If we shout loud enough, we will be heard. Keep shouting!

Thank you Steve Z. for your nurturing skepticism. While I do not think that my job interview today is a hoax, the battle is still not yet won. Alex C. could very well have been listening to my conversation and be planning on kidnapping me and showing up at the interview himself and blowing the interview for me with lots of small talk about a porn that he just rented called Mary Poopins. I don't know. Anything could happen. Keep the emails coming! Even if they really like me today, that doesn't mean that they might not really like someone else just a little more. Thank you all for your efforts and keep up the good work!

While there is general rejoicing here in the ASSHCM community regarding the news that Charles has an interview tomorrow, I admit to a degree of skepticism and would like to quote Mr Wolf in 'Pulp Fiction' and warn that it's too early to start sucking each others' dicks just yet.

As you can see from the comment made on my previous post, CM has some rather determined and extremely psychotic enemies who I believe would stop at nothing to cause harm to our Fearless Leader. It is not outside the realm of my twisted little imagination to be concerned that this might be a set-up.

I have no knowledge of the exact manner by which this interview was set up. Email? IP addresses can be spoofed. If you don't believe me, answer one of those supposed emails from Ebay asking you to validate your account information and find out how long it takes for mail-order Russian brides to show up on your credit card statement. A phone call? Please, even a 6 year old can crank-call. My point being, all our great telecommunication advances have yet to solve the basic question of 100% secure validated connections for all.

This may come off as sounding paranoid, but just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you. I double-dog dare you to ring up your friendly local kabob shop run by a couple of Muslim dudes and request one of their 'special' kabobs for delivery. Your communications will be intercepted, screened, parsed, and determined to be a coded message to Al Qaeda and quick as a wink you'll be disappeared in the middle of the night to Gitmo which will make Abu Ghraib look like a day at Wally World.

This is why I have a number of elaborate defense systems here at Chez Stevie Z. These are not times in which to remain passive and trusting in others to provide for your security. No, one must stock up on guns, kevlar, concussion grenades, gas masks, and tear gas cannisters because when it's 4am and there's a mob kicking down your door, calling the police is an exercise in futility. All that will happen is either the tape machine will 'malfunction' and there will be no record of your call or your call will be part of an 'Unsolved Mystery' episode.

Prepare for the worst, hope for the best. This will be our mantra as we wish our Fearless Leader godspeed. Stay alert, beware of any black sedans with tinted windows, and always leave yourself at least 2 escape routes.

Stevie Z
Provocateur General
1/12/06

The views expressed in this post are not necessarily those of Charles McCarthy, Eli Lilly pharmaceuticals, Charles Manson, or paraplegic ducks nicknamed 'The Hammer'.

Guess what! I have an interview at Adult Swim tomorrow!

This does not mean that you guys can slack off. Keep sending those emails! Let them know who the people want!

Don't stop now! This is just another game. Keep your head in the game. Stay focused. Eyes on the ball. Don't pee your pants!

Yes! Things are certainly looking up. The movement continues to grow. Steve Z. sure has shaken things up here at campaign headquarters with his hardline, in-your-face, approach to the task at hand, getting me a job at Adult Swim.

No one, Alex C., and nothing, the decline of western civilization, can stop me now!

Thank you all for your support and keep up the good work! Keep the emails to Adult Swim coming! Keep signing the petition! Keep thinking about buying a shirt or hat that says "hire charles mccarthy" on it!

Hello everyone. Please allow me to introduce myself. I am Stevie Z, self-proclaimed Provocateur General of the campaign to get Charles McCarthy hired by Adult Swim.

Why should they hire him? Let's just say that as much as we love the folks at Adult Swim to death, there are certain shows that are not all that strong. No names mentioned, but when a roomful of 30-something regressed stoners rocked off their asses on killer bud fail to find humor in it, that's saying quite a bit. We.... I mean they... found a dust ball dug out from under the couch by the cat more fascinating. And I'm telling you dawg, when you can't keep us them amused, your demographic has gone straight out the door and your advertisers will bolt, leaving you to fill in all those commercial breaks with anti-drug PSAs. Which, btw, are even more hysterical when you're stoned.

So why hire Charles McCarthy? Why the hell not? Good god people, look at his work. The man is a frickin' genius. It's sheer poetry on a level not seen since they shot Manson full of thorazine. Oh sure, you might look at his stuff and snort in derision, incapable of grasping the brilliance of it. But if he came to you five years ago telling you he had an idea for a 'toon based on a large fry, shake, and an indeterminate wad of meat, you would have sent for security. Now Aqua Teen Hunger Force is HUGE and you would be toasting him as a visionary and sacrificing babies in his honor.

But with certain other programs, not so much. We can do better. We deserve better. And Charles is the man who can deliver better.

Another reason to hire Charles. He's a desperate and dangerous man. He has made veiled threats and I suspect he may well have gone off his meds. If you use a jpeg decoder and scan several of his pics, you will see what I mean. I am begging you to please please please at least humor him until corraborating evidence gathered by the good folks at Homeland Security can be sent along. I understand that it will be accompanied by a super-secret Presidential Directive in honor of 1/13/02, the day when an Al Qaeda operative, disguised as a pretzel, attempted to choke the President to death during the NFL playoffs.

So you see, grave National Security issues are at stake here, and your failure to ACT NOW means that the terrorists have won. But there's still hope. Help us, Obi Wan. Help us.

Stevie Z
Provocateur General
1/11/06
The views expressed in this post are not necessarily those of Charles McCarthy, Eli Lilly pharmaceuticals, Charles Manson, or paraplegic ducks nicknamed 'The Hammer'.

Great news! I talked to the people at Adult Swim that said that they had never heard of me, and now they definitely know who I am, but that is not the best part. The best part is that if they didn't know anything about me, then one of you good people must have gotten me the phone interview that I had, and for that, I thank you one and all.

This is a picture of my lady friend when she was about ten years old, and her little sister.

Keep up the good work!

Today I found out about a minor setback in my quest to be hired by Adult Swim. I found out that they have never heard of me. I know. I know some of you probably lost faith in me just now. Some of you just gave up. Some of you think that it is hopeless. I know that is what some of you are thinking, but you have to stop thinking like that. I used to think like that, and it got me nowhere really, I worked in a bar called Nowhere Bar. You have to be positive.

I have finally gotten my internet at home straightened out, so now I can update by blog from home. This is a digital art piece about my struggle to be hired by Adult Swim by the artist Andres. It is titled, "just hire the guy." I think he perfectly captures my retro yet hip soul and the turbulence in my life.

I think I might hear something from Adult Swim tomorrow. I have a strange feeling. Thank you all for your support.

Happy New Year!

Sorry it has been so long since I have posted something. I have been having trouble getting on blogger from my home computer. There isn't much news, but apparently my comic, "Hire Charles McCarthy," is a big hit with the "kids."

Here they are folks, the first panels of the comic about me "Hire Charles McCarthy." There may be some tweaking going on with the character design etc. but I am pretty pumped. This comic was created by my good friend, a very talented young man Hugo Ballz. Be sure to check out his website HugoBallz.Com for more of his comic stylings. He is also quite the marketer, so you may soon be able to buy some "Hire Charles McCarthy" shoes or soap or something from his website. Be sure to check back with me for the latest "Hire Charles McCarthy" comic.