Good News folks!

First, my good friend Hugo has decided to draw a cartoon strip about my life. It will be kind of like "American Splendor" but better because my life is crazy. It will be about the last two years of my life leading up to me getting a job at Adult Swim. Check out HugoBallz.Com and check back with me. I will be putting the cartoon up on my blog every week.

Second, people at Adult Swim are starting to take notice of my campaign. Here is a letter from my number one fan Alex C. Alex is a little upset about some things going on in his own life right now, but if you knew him the way that I know him, you would see that he is very excited for me. His letter reads:

"Adult Swim will never hire you because you are a whiny
douchebag, Chuck. You are annoying everyone on
craigslist with your stupid and pathetic grovelling
and even an employee of Adult Swim made a post
laughing at you. I posted a link to your original
plea for attention way back when a month or so ago to
the Adult Swim message board -- you got nothing but
scorn and mockery.

You are one sad bastard. Just because you are too
underqualified or stupid to make it past the keyword
scanner on the turnerjobs/brassring Turner employment
site, you have to go and ruin other peoples' days with
your mumblings. I really hope you are in an accident
that leaves you in a coma so those people who wish you
would shut up could get their wish."


Thanks you Alex, and keep up the good work. We shall overcome.

Apparently some people still don't believe in the power of the people. I got this email from "Eric" today. He doesn't seem to believe that TV networks care what their audience thinks. Although I tend to agree with "Eric" to a certain degree, I don't think any institution can ignore a tightly organized grass roots movement for very long. "Eric" would have probably told Gandhi that no empire would give up it's colonial hold on India just because he refused to eat. He wrote:


"I do not like you. That is not reverse psychology, that is straight up.

It may seem like the all-american thing to do, to get a job by sheer force of perseverance and making a pest out of ones self, but what if you are wrong and you are wasting all this time and just annoying people with your posts? The truth of this scenario seems obvious to everyone but you.

The idea the at the customer is always right applies only up to a point. The tiny, miniscule percentage of people who BOTH view the show and sign your petition will not be convincing. The percentage of those who would BOTH sign your petition and actually boycott the show should you not be hired will be effectively zero. Thus you have no leverage. The sooner you realize this the better. When a major media conglomerate goes searching for employees, it will not be from the ranks of the desperate wannabes.

Please stop. I'm sure I speak for the masses of craigslist readers. Go away."




Thank you "Eric." I was actually starting to feel slightly daunted by my quest, but you have given me new inspiration. I have to give you, "Eric," something to believe in again.

Wow! Now look what I have now, my own line clothing line. I think it all just screams, "HIRE ME." What do you think? If anything will get Adult Swim's attention, it will be this.

No, not because all of the Adult Swim employees will want a cool hat or shirt or magnet that says "[hire charles mccarthy]," but because the Turner lawyers will probably send me some sort of cease and desist order in a couple of days, sighting some form of copyright infringement or something, so get em while they are hot. Also, don't forget to write to Adult Swim to tell them to hire me, and to sign my petition.


Adult Swim Should Hire Charles McCarthy Store

First, let me say Merry Christmas to everyone and also Happy Holidays. I hope you all are having a better holiday season than me.

Now to the good news. It seems like I might have a stalker. I am so excited! Like any stalker he seems confused about his sexuality, his intentions towards me, but is completely and totally obsessed with me. I am not sure what his name is. I hope it is something cute but nothing with three names. We all know what that would mean. Here is the letter he sent me via Craig's List:

"I've seen some desperate posters, but dude..you are in each town, in each section..annoying the shit out of everyone.If you can't get on it on your own, this may be the reason..you are simply very ANNOYING. I personally liked it much better when you worked for Liberty Curio. I watched your ebay auctions..some pretty ccol stuff..especially the horse fetuses in the tanks..weird. Oh and the guy that bought them, I looked at the kind of stuff he bought, I'm sure he was a serial killer or a wannabe, cuz he had some strange things he bought, but then you KNOW that. Give this 'Adult Swim' thing up Chucky..go back to Ebay and other endeavors..and PLEASE quit bugging us!
Peace dude"


Thank you stalker. You don't know how much it means to me to have a stalker of my own, and a good stalker who has been following me for a while, taking notes meticulously on my career. Please feel free to sign my petition, or chant my name while you run around naked in your basement.

Several people have made known their belief that Time Warner and in turn Turner and again in turn Cartoon Network and hence Adult Swim do not care and will not care about my petition.

A person calling himself "psymon" wrote, "It's a novel idea, but you forget one thing, A petition means squat in the corporate world. Ted Turner won't hire you Charlie, tough luck.Move on to the next job."

Someone else calling himself "Patricmoses" said, "hey guy, hate to breakit to you but [as] dosent give
a rats **bleep** about you. or anyone for that matter."

This was my response to both of them:

"You are wrong. Why are you wrong? It boils down to a very simple and cliche saying, 'The customer is always right.' You are all Adult Swim customers, and if enough of you feel a certain way, Adult Swim will bend to your desires. This is why they actually look at the message boards every once in a while. If it was up to just one person, especially a person who has a history of being persnickety like Ted Turner, he could just decide that he was going to ignore everyone. A corporation won't do that, especially one that is publicly traded like Time Warner. A corporation that is publicly owned is inherently democratic."

Television networks do care about what their watchers think. If they didn't care about what watchers thought, their would be no ratings, no surveys, no focus groups to determine what to put on and when.

Help me out. Sign my petition or email Adult Swim and tell them to hire me.

I have been getting some great feedback from people. Here is a very nice and uplifting one from Mike.

"Dude, You are such a loser. Quit wasting everybodies time with your pathetic pleas to intervene and help you land a job with Adult Swim. Take a hint, they don't want you so go away. Show a little class."

Thanks Mike. I appreciate your reverse psychology. I will keep it up and going strong. Thanks for the tough love.

It is going to be a long hard battle!

I have created the perfect holiday magical creature to stop all the talk of the war on Christmas, and to consolidate all the holiday traditions.

His name is Panda Clause. He is a panda bear who brings presents to everyone.

Everyone loves pandas.

Yes! We finished shooting the commercials that I wrote yesterday. I am very pleased. We got some amazing footage of an old Indian man and also a bartender named Mezba. I am pretty sure that the job offers will start flying in once these commercials hit cable TV. I would like to think that one of those offers will be from Adult Swim.

None of you have heard anything about my job prospects at Adult Swim have you? You can tell me. I won't tell anyone.


I promise.

My commercials should be done in a couple of weeks. I will put them online with a link to them on here so that you can all check them out.

Thank you all for your support. Still no news from Adult Swim. Keep up the good work though.

My commercial for Bamboo Garden is going well.

Recently I added my name to Wikipedia. For those of you who are not familiar with Wikipedia, it is an online encyclopedia that is updated and edited by anyone who feels that it is their duty to do something like constantly edit and update an encyclopedia. Anyway, recently I added an entry about myself, Charles J. McCarthy III as there was not an entry for anyone named Charles J. McCarthy III. I saw no harm in adding an entry about myself because I exist and if there is no one else more important than me with the exact same name as me, what harm could come of it. I didn't say anything that was untrue or any more untrue than most of the history that children study in school about people long dead, but apparently the addition of my name to the Wikipedia upset someone because my listing was erased. I put it back and it was erased again. They also keep erasing the addition that I made to the Adult Swim definition:

For example, recently a man calling himself Charles J. McCarthy III has been actively campaigning to be hired by the network with marginal success. He posted a message on the Adult Swim message board that read, "Tell Adult Swim to hire me." Adult Swim responded with the message, "Sorry, we don't need anymore janitors."


Why is someone so upset about the prospect of the world knowing that I exist and something about some of my accomplishments? Are they trying to tell me that I don't exist? Are they scared that I will get a job at Adult Swim? I don't think we will ever know the answers to these questions especially if they are constantly being erased from Wikipedia. Luckily, they can't erase my blog, or at least I don't think that they can.

I guess I will have to keep adding myself to the history of the world according to Wikipedia.

Click here to see the definition of Adult Swim and to see who is winning the battle.

I have received an overwhelming amount of support for my campaign to be hired by Adult Swim, and yet some of you, and rightly so, have asked whether I am qualified or not. Here is my professional resume. This does not include all the production work that I have done, or my brief stint as an erection specialist ( I built big tents). You be the judge. Do I have what it takes?

Charles J. McCarthy III

PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE
08/05 – Present – 70/30 Productions
Illustration
Draw characters in Adobe Illustrator for upcoming Adult Swim show Frisky Dingo

02/05 – 04/05 – Liberty Curio
Sales/Marketing
Photographed items and wrote copy for Internet sales, managed inventory and customer relations

03/04 – 12/04 – Jake’s Ice Creams & Sorbets
Special Events Aid/Marketing Assistant/Advertising Assistant/Production Assistant/Art Director
Formulated marketing strategies, managed in store signage and art work, wrote copy for and designed print advertisements, wrote and edited portions of franchise operations manual, wrote and did layout for company Internet news letter, and created new flavors of ice cream

4/01 – 03/04 – Tinwood Media
Special Events Aid
Aided in the opening events of art exhibits at the Museum of Fine Arts Houston and The Whitney Museum of American Art in New York, also assisted with research for books, “Gees Bend, The Women and Their Quilts” and exhibits catalogues

11/03 – German American Chamber of Commerce
Freelance Artist
Created trade show advertisements for their Wendt & Kühn and WKO accounts.

5/03 – 8/03 – German American Chamber of Commerce
Independent Subcontractor
Collected data for mobile voice recognition software using mobile DAT recording systems

5/03 – Cold Stone Creamery
Independent Contractor/Artist
Co-produced and painted 20x10’ Mural

7/04/02 – CBS 46 Atlanta
Production Assistant
Performed general PA work and line feed for onstage cameraman in the middle of a 300,000 person audience at annual 4th of July live fireworks extravaganza

5/02 – 8/02 – Cable Advertising of Metro Atlanta/AT&T
Production Intern
Assisted on shoots and in the studio; wrote and produced commercials; handled camera work on local sports show, voice-overs, assisted in editing on both AVID and Final Cut Pro systems.

3/02 – 9/03 – Tinwood Media
Research Assistant
Acted as a research assistant for the documentary film “The Quilts of Gees Bend,” dealing with location logistics

9/01 – 8/02 – Audacity Comedy Quarterly
Staff/Advertising Sales Representative
Brainstormed content and articles, drew cartoons; worked on distribution as well as some outside advertising sales around the Athens Clarke County area selling to local small business owners

COMPUTER SKILLS
Adobe PhotoShop, Word, Windows, Internet, Dream Weaver, Adobe Illustrator, Html, Flash and MS Dos

EDUCATION
1993 – 1997 – Rabun Gap Nacoochee School
Completed a College Preparatory curriculum including several Advanced Placement classes while being involved in many extra curricular activities and clubs.

1997 – 2003 – University of Georgia, Athens
Earned AB in Studio Art, Deans List, Presidents List

ACCOMPLISHMENTS
Atlanta Boy Choir, Georgia Youth Coral – NYC, Big Event ‘97’, Jane Austin Literary Society, Work Study Student News Power Point Bulletin, 3 years Varsity Soccer, 4 years Varsity Tennis, West Side Story, The Wiz, Damn Yankees, Cofounder and First President of Tri Chi Fraternal Brotherhood, ‘99’ Designed Website


SUMMARY
I especially enjoy interacting with a variety of people, accepting challenging projects and solving problems with creative solutions.

I took this picture, me, Charles McCarthy. Can this kind of comedic genius be ignored? How can Adult Swim ignore this? They can't.

I am getting some help from some pretty high places, believe it or not, and my quest to be hired by Adult Swim is looking more and more promising, but for the next week or so I will be distracted from my quest. I have said it before, and I will say it again. I am producing two commercials for a Chinese restaurant called Bamboo Garden. It is owned and operated by Indians, from India, so it tastes like Chinese food in India. I am pretty excited about these commercials because I wrote them and I will be directing them. It is pretty awesome even though it probably won't get me any closer to getting a job at Adult Swim, or will it? Muhahaha! The best moves you can make in chess are both defensive and offensive at the same time.

Guess what.

Yeah. Go ahead and guess.

You can't can you? You can't handle the pressure.

Fine, I'll tell you. I just finished a hard night of working on a funny funny funny movie that I am writing with my campaign manager, Erni Crews.

Do you have any funny movie ideas? Tell me. I won't steal them. I promise.



Fine! I don't trust you either and for that you get an angry picture of me at Tangstache 05.

For the record "Tamagotchi" is in the spell check on here, but, but, wait for it, "blog" is not.

Vote for me for Adult Swim. I am the better Chuck.

My lady friend is becoming a cartoon character. It would be silly for me not to work at Adult Swim now.

What do you think I mean by this cryptic statement?

Isn't this the sexiest woman you have ever seen? I think she is so beautiful. Isn't she beautiful? She is beautiful, and she doesn't just look smart. She is smart. She told me the other day that she really hopes I get a job at Adult Swim, and that it would make her very happy. Don't you want to make a beautiful woman happy?

I was just watching All The Right Moves with Tom Cruise and Craig T. Nelson and came up with a new plan to make sure that I get a job at Adult Swim. I am going to roll Mike Lazzo's house, let him catch me and then be black balled from Adult Swim. Then I will see Mike at Waffle House and make a heart felt apology. When Mike tries to respond, I will tell him that he isn't god and I will run off down the street. Then I will get a job in a coal mine. Mike will think about his actions and realize that me rolling his house was actually pretty funny, then he will offer me a football scholarship to the college that he is going to coach at.

How does that plan sound to you all? I guess it doesn't get me a job at Adult Swim in the end, but I do get to go to college and play ball.

I am already working possible new show pitches. If only I can get my foot in the door.


Imagine a world where the power of Voltron is twisted to Mumra's evil will with a spell that he casts on the Voltron team. The Thundercats are forced into underground caves, just like Afganistani freedom fighters(now called bad guys) in Rambo 3. They have to figure out a way to match up against the awesome power of Voltron. I don't want to ruin it for everyone, but I foresee lots of "Hoooooooos" and Panthro building a giant fighting robot to fight head to head with Voltron. Would the Sword of Omens get that big? Which would kick more ace in a fight? Will sight beyond sight help Liono reverse the spell on team Voltron? Will spirits of evil transform a decaying bag of bones into a villainous monster of awesome strength who is scared of his own reflection once again? Will robotic lions triumph over angelical cats (try comparing the Thundercats with cast members of Cats the musical), or will they dance their way out of yet another situation where Cheetara's sexiness is the only thing that can save the day? Will good overcome evil?

Hobo
by
Charles McCarthy

There aren't any hobos left
and if there are they are far
between if you know what I mean.
People like to talk about them still
and remember when
the hobos were real men.
But FDR got them all jobs
painting fences and murals on walls.
The hobos are all gone.

Some people as of late, and for many years have made fun of hobos. I can't say that there isn't something funny with the portrayals of hobos, but hobos were real people, displaced people, and in any other time or any other place they would have been called refugees. Or they could be seen as the last vestige of the American spirit, the restless energy and drive to keep moving, to keep searching for something better. Sometimes I feel like a hobo as I move, not across the country, but amongst social spheres, jobs, bars, and other aspects and dimensions of life.

I bet you are wondering why I am up at 9am on a Saturday. Well, I have been up since around 8am. Besides trying to get a job at Adult Swim, I run a church basketball league. Why? I'm a fine upstanding young man, and I like basketball. I really wish I could be playing with the kids. I really love to play basketball. One of the things that I miss about college is basketball. I used to go play basketball 4-5 times a week for hours on end. I have played basketball with many different people, some of them are pretty famous now. Don't you wish you knew whom I am referring to?

Besides trying to get Adult Swim to hire me, I am producing a couple of commercials for a Chinese Restaurant owned by Indians. It is called Bamboo Garden. I have been focusing on casting the actors. I am looking for an Indian man 20-30yrs old, a Chinese woman 20-30yrs old, and an old Indian man 65+yrs old. Easy right? No!

I have run into a brick wall where it comes to old Indian men. Apparently there are no old Indian men, and I mean Indian from India, who want to be on TV.

That makes me think of something else funny that I have run into. When I am asking people if they would like to be in a TV commercial, some people say no. Why would you ever turn down a chance to make money and be on TV unless you are wanted by the cops, and even then, you could be long gone before the commercial ever aired.

I was on Dawson's Creek once. Dawson is much better looking in person and Katie Holmes has a big scar on her neck right under her chin.

I thought I would throw that in just so that people who are big into Katie Holmes, who sit around googling her name, will find my blog and then they will discover that telling Adult Swim to hire me is a much more fulfilling pastime.

Always thinking. Don't ever stop thinking.

I was starting to feel down but then I got this encouraging email from Sam.

"Hmmmmm no credentials to teach swimming, can ride bike but not have swam in years. Then again, I have room in east bay for someone sexy like you . I could use you as my personal aide, if you know what I mean and just to give you a bigger hint, it would be free room and board. Can you say ahhhh?

Cheers,

Sam"

Thanks Sam. I do know how important it is to smile in interviews, and to open your mouth and not mumble. I will try the voice exercises you suggested, and while I appreciate your offer, I have to be in Atlanta to work for Adult Swim.

Guess who's campaign manager created an online petition for them...



It's me silly!

Click this if you agree with it and sign my petition!

To: Adult Swim
We the people of the world feel way down deep in our hearts that Charles McCarthy should work at Adult Swim, and we will not stop until we see him hard at work at Adult Swim. We believe that Charles McCarthy is by far the most qualified candidate, and we will not be ignored. There is no bridge we won't burn, no rock we won't turn, not channel on cable that we won't spurn to see Charles McCarthy in his rightful place at Adult Swim. Charles McCarthy is Adult Swim, and Adult Swim is Charles McCarthy. ADULT SWIM SHOULD HIRE CHARLES MCCARTHY TODAY!

No entity large or small can ignore the will of the people!


Tell Adult Swim how you feel.


Email Adult Swim

I am feeling blue. I haven't heard from Adult Swim yet, and I am sick.

Speaking of "blue," my friend Justin was in the live action stage show of Blue's Clues. I bet you all saw it.

He played Slippery Soap. Sippery Soap is a giant bar of soap that talks and sings and dances. Doesn't that sound like fun?

In many ways, we are like bars of soap, slowly melting away until there is nothing left but maybe our scent on the last person who was able to use the last little sliver before it slipped out of their hands and zipped down the drain.

I hope you are having a better day than me. Maybe you could email Adult Swim and tell them to hire me. It won't cure my cold, but it would make me a little happier.

Apparently some people are angered by my dream. They don't want me to get hired by Adult Swim because they can feel no joy for other people.

Robin wrote:


"Come on! Have you no shame?
This is not the "job postings" area. This is an area for "HOUSING WANTED"

Please limit postings in this area to actual housing wanted ads. Don't ruin it all for the rest of us.

As to your job search. Adult Swim would be foolish to hire you when you can't even follow simple directions.

If you were indeed good enough, you wouldn't need to keep posting this stupid ad every day. They would hire you on your own merit. It is ridiculous."


Robin, I need a job and I need an apartment. Why not let people know about both at the same time? It is called multitasking and companies like that in employees. Think outside the box Robin, outside the box, unless someone put you in that box for a reason, like you are an evil demon. Also, "ridiculous" is right. Maybe you are not familiar with Adult Swim, but most of the shows on adult swim revolve around ridiculous plot lines. Thank you for tempering your negative energy with positive compliments.

Tyler wrote:

"Dude give it up, Adult Swim don't want you. If they did they would have hired you the first 30 times you sent them your resume."

Tyler, I haven't sent them my resume "30 times," but maybe I will try that next. Thanks to you sir for your wonderful idea. I will give credit where credit is due.

I still need help. Tell Adult Swim to hire me.

My right nostril is clogged, but my left is clean and clear. How does this happen? It's this kind of deep-meaning of life-what's that about kind of questions that will set this blog appart from the others. Haha.

So have you told Adult Swim to hire me yet?

Do you know what Adult Swim is?

Here is a poem to let you know a little more about Adult Swim.

Adult Swim
by
Charles McCarthy

Adult Swim
is a block of
adult shows
that shows
late at night
on Cartoon Network
It has funny shows
like Aqua Teen Hunger Force
and Robot Chicken
If those names
don't get you excited
The names alone are worth
saying out loud
Say it with me
Adult Swim
Hire Charles McCarthy

I sent some poems to the New Yorker. They didn't publish them.
They wrote me a very nice note that basically said that my poems were,
"...too real..." whatever that means.

My blog doesn't seem to be viewable right now. I can only assume that so many people were going to it, that it crashed the server. This is a real setback in my grass roots campaign to be hired by Adult Swim.

I just talked to some people and they told me that they thought that my grass roots campaign was a good idea.

That makes me feel good. Doesn't it make you feel like joining the fight?




Go to Adult Swim and tell them to hire me.



Still asking yourself, "Why should I tell them to hire him?"


Check out my band Attractive Eighties Women!

We rock!

In our first show ever, we raised $1100 for the Katrina recovery effort.

Now, now don't you think you have to take back all those nasty things you were saying about me?

Why don't you do the right thing?

Go to AdultSwim.com and tell them to hire me, Charles McCarthy.

Okay so about the tents, I was fresh out of college and I needed a job. I graduated with a BA in studio art. Let me tell all you young kids out there who are reading this, don't expect to get a job right away that pays over $7hr when you graduate from college with a degree in studio art (check out chuckmccarthy.com if you are curious as to what my art looks like).

Where was I?

Oh yes, the tents.

I found a job working for a company that I will call Wevent Elabor Lworks, which is a subcontracted labor company for a large German company I will call Roooder. I met all of their requirements. I had two hands and two legs and at least nine fingers.

I met the guy who hired me at a Starbucks, the same Starbucks that I was hired at, and got in a van with two Canadian guys who had driven down from Montreal. Apparently rental cars are cheaper in Canada.

We drove down to Miami and got to work right away.

I was supposed to be in Miami for a month and a half. I was there for three weeks.

Tune in next time to find out what happened and also go to AdultSwim.com and tell them to hire me.

Some of you might not believe me about the tents. It is completely true. Really.


I will give you some more details later on today if I get a chance.



AdultSwim.Com

That is a link to AdultSwim.Com where you can send an email telling them to hire me.

Here is a poem for you.


Handy Guy
by
Charles McCarthy

Handy guy am I
I am a handy guy
like a jack of all
trades but my name
is chuck
and you can guess
what you get when
you go with the
flow with me
a handy guy
no not like that
get your mind out of
the gutter and call
a lawyer.

Some of you may have had some problems figuring out how to email Adult Swim


Well, I made it easy for you. I went and used some of my HTML skills and made a link for you.


Email Adult Swim



Did you know that I used to work building giant tents? Huge tents. I used to have it on my resume, but I got a lot of funny looks from potential employers when they read that I used to be an erection specialist.

Tell them to hire me. It will make you feel good.

Hello.

This is my first post on this blog. Let me introduce myself. My name is Charles McCarthy III. I am from Atlanta, Ga.
I am trying to get a job at Adult Swim.

For those of you who don't know what Adult Swim is, Adult Swim is a block of cartoons that comes on Cartoon Network at night. These cartoons are funny and are for adults.

I know you might not be sold yet on me, but you should check out Adult Swim.

If you want to help me get a job on Adult Swim, go to AdultSwim.Com and email them.

I will be back with updates and poems to help you see the light.


Charles McCarthy