Monday, May 07, 2007

McDonalds on the Moon

I think we all know that the world's resources are rapidly dwindling. We are not going to be able to cut back on consumption and population growth enough to stop the violent economic and environmental collapses that are eminent if we continue on this course.

I can see only one solution. McDonalds needs to team up with Walmart, Coca Cola, GM, and Boeing to build the first human outpost on the moon along with a McDonalds and a Walmart.

How does this help the earth? There is no environment on the moon to destroy, no species to kill off, and plenty of land. Pollute it all you want, it will just make the view of the moon from earth more interesting. Millions of people could immigrate to the moon, taking a great deal of stress off of the global ecosystem.

Why does this make sense for McDonalds and friends? It makes sense for two major reasons. First, certain advantages in production and actual business. Production costs on the moon would be high at first, really high, but once the facilities and infrastructure were built McDonalds and Walmart could grow food in giant greenhouses, bathed in a constant summer sun. Imagine how big and fat cows and other livestock could grow in such a low gravity environment. Think of the alloys that GM and Boeing could produce and use in there products, and how production could be carried out with little regard to waste byproducts. Moreover, the major interest of the Walmart corporation has always been real-estate and they have been building new Walmart village prototypes across the country that combine a smaller Walmart store with apartments and other shops and restaurants. Finally, you can't have McDonalds fries and burgers without a coke to wash it all down. Why shouldn't these companies, the most recognizable brands in the world, want to be the most recognizable brands in the solar system? Second, Think of the publicity and good will it would generate for their brands. Think of the marketing campaigns, and new products it would spawn, the "McMoon Burger," "Solar Soda." From purely a PR and advertising standpoint, this makes sense financially. Think of the contests that McDonalds and Coke could run. Enter to win! Be the first person to have McDonalds fries on the moon!

The best part about this is that wherever McDonalds builds a McDonalds, Burger King and scores of other franchises are quick to follow. How could Pepsi let Coke be the only drink sold on the moon? How can Burger King only "BK" on earth? Moreover, they could not withstand the backlash that would come from not trying to set up shop on the moon. They don't care about the earth enough to colonize the moon to take the stress off of our fragile environment? I'm not eating at Burger King anymore. Think about it.

So what can we do? Talk about it. Call companies up. Email them. Write letters to McDonalds, Coke, Walmart. Write letters to newspapers. Those of you who are better writers than me, who understand what I am saying, rewrite this, expand the arguments, and send it out to everyone you know. Email your friends.

Get out there and start the ball rolling,

Charles McCarthy

Here is some contact info that I have been able to gather.

McDonalds
One McDonald's Plaza
Oak Brook, IL 60521
Telephone #(630) 623-3000

WalMart
Customer Service
702 S.W. 8th Street
Bentonville, AR 72716
http://walmartstores.com/GlobalWMStoresWeb/navigate.do?catg=221


GM
P.O. Box 33170
Detroit, MI 48232-5170

Or

New Devices Section
General Motors Corporation
30001 Van Dyke Ave.
MC: 480-210-701
Warren, MI 48090
USA

Boeing
There are a bunch of options.
http://www.boeing.com/contactus.html

Burger King
5505 Blue Lagoon Drive
Miami, Florida 33126
P:305.378.3000

Pepsi
700 Anderson Hill Road
Purchase, NY 10577
(914) 253-2000

New York Times
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
E-mail to letters@nytimes.com.

OP-ED/EDITORIAL
For information on Op-Ed submissions, call (212) 556-1831 or send article to oped@nytimes.com. To write to the editorial page editor, send to editorial@nytimes.com.

Los Angeles Times
letters@latimes.com
http://www.latimes.com/services/site/la-contactus,0,1439615.htmlstory

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

New Direction

I have created a pilot for the new Turner Broadband site.

It is called Rock and Roll Lawyer, and it will be a big hit.

Saturday, April 29, 2006

Bamboo Garden

I think that I mentioned making some commercials for the Chinese food franchise Bamboo Garden but many of you probably have not had a chance to see the commercials since they are only playing on Aljazeera and other select satellite stations. Through the magical technology of Myspace.com I am able to bring them to you today. Here they are. Let me know, and more importantly, let Adult Swim know what you think.



Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Back In The Saddle Again

I know you have all missed me, and you probably think that the dream is dead. Dreams never die, only dreamers who decide to dream while standing in the middle of the road or on some train tracks. I have not given up, but I have been distracted. I have recently been working on several TV show pilots and world broadcast TV shows. In fact, you might have seen me ringside on last weeks ESPN Friday Night Fights.

I have also been helping to put together the soon to be international blockbuster film, International Douche Bag that will be sweeping the globe sometime next year or so.

Yes, I have been busy, and I am in the news again. My superior artistic talent has been recognized by the Red & Black once again.

Don't stop the fight!

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

My New Jam

It's been a long time. I shouldn't have left you without a phat beat to step to, so here it is, the newest hot song about me Hire Charles McCarthy by MR. Mips.

If anyone wants to make a dance remix of this song, that would be cool.

The battle may be over, but the war has just begun!

Monday, March 06, 2006

Gallery Opening

I am sorry that I haven't kept you all up to date on what's going on. I have been hard at work putting my art show together. I know you will all be there, and those of you who can't be there in person will be there in spirit. Here are all the details at a glance.

Where: Sabra Gallery in East Atlanta. Go to SabraGallery.com for directions.

When: Saturday March 11, 2006 - 7-10pm.

What: My art and some free vino.


I'll see you all there.

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Attractive Eighties Women


My band Attractive Eighties Women is now seeking both a new drummer, and a keyboard/key-tar player. We want our drummer to play other intstruments, because he is not a very good drummer, and our old keyboard player fell down a well, and well, died. Yeah. It was sad.

If you think you have what it takes, and you want to relocate to the Atlanta area, send me a picture of yourself, some links to some samples of your abilities, and also some sort of convoluted statement as to why you want to be part of AEW.

To tell you the truth, we would really like another female keyboard player, and it would be great if she had mystique.